oh, the feeling!

it's starting to feel a lot like christmas! the lights in dtown are twinkling brightly. i think it's starting early this year...

holy moly, i am almost done with 431 and things are looking good! i did NOT fail my group case study but got a D. with the curve, my group managed to get a 86%, cheee! i don't care what i get on this individual case because i will still pass regardless. suck yeah!

PS: ok, i am absolutely in love with taylor swift. i can't stop listening to her music. enchanted is my next favorite song :) listen away on the right hand side ^_^

holiday blues

i always, always get sad during big celebrations such as my birthday, thanksgiving, and christmas. today is thanksgiving. i think not having a family to spend it with really sucks. it's just either me and my mom or me and my dad. as of a couple years ago, my mom has been out of the picture since she always work. what a lonely time. i guess what really got me going downhill was i went over to my dad's apartment after volunteering and was suppose to have lunch with him. instead, i ended up eating his kalua turkey meal from his meal-on-wheels program while he ate a can of pork and beans. it was just so depressing. of course, there are things i am thankful for regardless of the situation...

i am thankful for (in no particular order):

• my friends. they always have my back when i need them...most of the time :)
• my family even though they hate each other and i can barely remember the last time all four of us were together in the same room i still love them.
• my health and education
• my cat even though he's completely antisocial i know he cares about me deep down :D

PS: i think i just need a good cry to clear my mind. i feel much better now.

busy bee

the next two weeks will be crazy busy. 431 has me on a leash. 10-15 page articles must be read before class for a written assignment, exam next week tuesday, and my 8-10 pg SINGLE space case study due the following tuesday. what...the....fuck. 369E isn't any better. my stupid group presentation is for the following thursday after my crazy long case study and i feel that lawler's geocaching project is due sometime that week. hotel spreadsheet due same day as my 431 exam. HELP!

air conditioning has been broken for the past week. it's driving everyone crazy. poor havoc have to suffer all day in the hot hot room.

i feel so incomplete these past few days. i need to be a better person. i'm scared janelle will one day commit suicide because i was too mean to her. i will strive to be a better daugther, sister, friend, girlfriend, person, student, whatever. i really need to make some changes.

graduation is in a few weeks and i am utterly terrified of my future. i don't think going with the flow is really such a great idea. i don't wanna miss out on an opportunity and will never be able to seize it again. idk.

i hate you

I hate you with a passion. I am borderline drunk right now thanks to you. But seriously, I hate you so fucken much. Thanks for ruining my life with your inconsiderate self. Do yourself a favor to society and bury yourself underground already. Kthx. People like you will never change. Too full of themselves.

On a happier note, I got to check out mr. bartender again, AND I asked for his name ;)

guilt

happy november!

october ended with an AWESOME bang! i must admit it was probably the BEST halloween ever. thursday night (10/28) was the yelp elite event. choke fun. saturday night was halloballoo in chinatown. trevor and the mechanical bull was funny lol. tweaked my ankle and had a owie on my knee :( sunday, halloween, awesome first day at work. small kine delay but it was a blast.

in denial with school all week and kinda did not so hott but flash forward to this weekend....

KEVIN'S BDAY RAGER! hahahahah

FRIDAY: what should've been the most awesome day was kinda filled with guilt for some reason. possibly bombed my 302 exam, went to work, lovely drama with SABRE and a baby's passport at check in, flight delayed even more due to maintenance but got free starbucks and food out of it :) went din din with peeps at gyukaku. it was fun but for $20/person, i was kinda expecting more food, but then again, we did drink a lot.

bar 35, my favoritest place in the world. kevin was dumb. he shoulda paced himself instead of buying like 4 shots for everyone within 5 minutes. clearly, not a smart idea. thank you kyle, trevor, and dylan, you guys are lifesavers. because of kevin's genius shot ideas, he was done in less than two hours! had to be escorted out of the club before fricken midnight! unbelievable :P
mr. bartender was there and sexy and hott as usual. this stupid crush has got to stop! i'm such a sucker. went to kevin's house to check up on him and cruised. shon smoked out little pengy. so funny. lobster king and ktfo.

the morning after...i was feeling alright :) i kept having this guilty feeling overwhelming me all day. still feeling it now. maybe it's because kevin got so messed up. maybe because i was spending everyone's money unknowingly lol. maybe i was too obsessed with mr. bartender?! IDK! i feel so bad over last night! i mean, i should've had so much more fun but i was so confused and messed up. ugh, terrible feelings.

today, manned my mom's restaurant, went road tripping with her with $600+ in delivery. drove all around with the fajah. pooped.