make a wish foundation

so the past two days were spent doing all the things we wanted to do. yesterday, amanda, sarah, ally, and i went to the beach. it wasn't a very nice day so that was a bummer. we found cake couture and it was amazering! it's a little cupcake shop in aina hina shopping center. next to it was chuck c. cheese. having such a deprived childhood, i have not gone to one so this was my golden opportunity!!! what a letdown though. it looks like a nicer and cleaner version of fun factory. the robotic animal band is creepy as hell. that is fine, i get to say i've been to one :) for dinner a bunch of us ate shabu shabu. the broth choices were spicy or tomato beef. both kinda yucky for me but i powered through them. it was a good dinner but i wish it was more fulfilling if we chose a better tasting broth for me lol.

today made more wants come true! amanda wanted to go hiking so we did that in the gloomy weather. hiked makapuu and planned to go beach after but the weather was a fail. did an island road trip from east to haleiwa but it was storming during the drive. gg. amanda and i have never tried kahuku shrimp so we ate our fill today. i'm happy for the activities we've been doing since i am trying so hard to stay as busy as possible to keep my mind from racing.

new year's is coming up soon. time for resolutions.

blog worthy

let's talk saturday night. what made that particular night soooo blog worthy?? well, it was pretty lame but so much kinda could've happened throughout the night.

• bought alcohol for the first time using the fake. the lady started asking me and leon for our ages and i started freaking out haha
• UCLA and UW club night at xyloh with sarah and amanda. LAME. left after an hour half or so
• went to mikey's house for beer pong but everyone was all done by the time we got there
• wanted to eat so we went to toho's just to get kicked out since we weren't gonna drink. how embarrassing...
• finally went to million's and ate food

yeah, it was a super duper lame night. dunno what else to say about it except im glad to have gone out the very least.

where is the...

...christmas spirit??? like last year, this christmas doesn't seem like christmas. but i will be blogging some stuff that made it eventful thus far...

i realize as i get older, i get less presents. it's not about quantity, its quality. the stuff i get just gets better every year :) i spent a butt load of money but it was worth it. so far, every day i receive a present is christmas for me; they end up getting opened. i only have ONE unopened gift i'm trying so hard to save for the big day and that is a card sarah got for me. i finally got an iPod. its the green nano yayayayaya :D :D :D

luke's annual secret santa getogether was a great success! too bad so many people had to leave early, me being one of them. the jeopardy game was awesome!!! it was a lot of fun because my awesome possum team (amy and leon) kicked everyone else's tooshies. haha. props for lukie for coming up with that game and all those questions. my secret santa this year was amy cha-ang. she gave me a super pretty ds case. its more compact than the one i stood in line for 5 hours at walmart for. @_@.

oh christmas eve...i hope i end up doing something these couple of days.

fcuk wine

last night a wine distributor had their party at phuket thai and left like 8 unfinished bottles of wine. it was slammin' at work. danny sharon and neal came to eat so i got to see them :D after work, we drank most of the wine. i was just drinking the white ones but after about three and a half glasses i was fucked up. who would've guessed wine had such potency. screw drinking hards when you pregame, drink wine! it goes down easier and you get drunk so fast. idk how those little ladies share a bottle by themselves because i can't even handle. went to wailana coffee house after. thank you waitress for being so patient with us.

happy anniversary

happy one year anniversary, iDiary! over the course of the past 365 days, there have been SO much that has happened to me. i came home looking for refuge from my empty life in las vegas and i found it for the first half of the year at kcc. ran the entire length of the great aloha run to free myself from all ties that bind. i swore i had the good luck chuck curse but my heart healed a little from a school girl crush on my fellow classmate, aka my garden. found a great job at an unsuspecting restaurant which has taken me far. crazy summer nights at xyloh and venus. finally made a fantasy come true. smoked a lot of weed over the semester. endured the most dullest semester of my life at UH. now, 127 posts later...

i sometimes read over the entries i've written in the past and they bring back so many poignant memories. this year has been rough since i spent so much time forgetting las vegas times and stop feeling sorry for myself. this year wasn't as exciting as 2007 but it was still fun nonetheless. christmas is in four days, shit.

here is a song from britney spear's new album titled Quicksand:

final's week fiasco

update: so after much studying, i think i did bad on my TIM final. whatevers, so over that class. since i am FREE, please call me, text me, anything to go out! i'm down for anything!

for having only two finals, this week has sure been stressful. i think it's the distraction that everyone is back home. i know i can just pick up my phone and call someone and i could be doing something much more entertaining than reading. and there is something always good on tv when you're clearly occupied with more important things.

today was my chinese final. it was at an ungodly hour of 7:30 AM! i was up before the sun was out which never happened this semester thus far. i had a mandatory wine tasting for phuket thai last night which kept me out until 12. whoopie doo, wine tasting before a huge exam, chee! haha. it was good since i learned a lot about wines. chinese final was a breeze and now its time for TIM. dun dun dunnnnnn! i think i've basically given up on it already. just do it and i should be fine. ill settle for a B.

weather sucks. my legs are as white as those coming home from the mainland. sad.

broken wallet? no, broken heart

today i spent so much money i swore my heart was breaking. i only have a couple more gifts left. i guess it doesnt help im feeling generous. i think my friends deserve quality gifts and i give it to them in according to how they deserve/need it. times are definitely hard, probably be super chang after the holiday season is over. blahhh

it was great to see everyone home! no one look any different and it didnt seem like a few months has passed since i've last seen them. it sucks that everyone is back home and us UH folks still have finals. the next few days will be dedicated to studying, yuck.

i swear i had more to write but i can't seem to think of anything else :/ until next time, i guess haha.

strollin'

shhhhhhh! i'm suppose to be doing my extra credit work for astronomy but instead i've decided to do some blogging :D the semester is ALMOST done! UH is dumb for having it a week longer than all the other schools. i guess i'm pretty fortunate that my finals are gonna be cake. i need a 50% for my chinese written final to keep my A so the only one i need to study hard for is TIM. not bad at all...

i took a walk last night around downtown by myself. it was nice to see all the pretty lights. i walked to all of my favorite spots that i find appealing at night and i wish i could take someone with me the next time. i returned to my second favorite spot for the first time in about maybe five years? nothing has changed except for the company since i had none lol. i wonder if i would go see the honolulu lights this year. last year, i almost didn't go since i had no one to go with but thank goodness for my boys! this year is definitely gonna be different fo sho.

everyone is coming home soon! i'm so excited yet nervous at the same time. excited to see my friends and nervous due to some trust issues with things. there is just so much to do and so little time! like what i mentioned in previous posts about skydiving, well, i don't know about that anymore...sorry guys! idk, i started freaking out as i was reading some reviews on it. maybe it's a little too much to swallow at such a young age.

come winter

hello december!

this month is kicking off so so. its been having its ups and downs. like i mentioned in the last post, it is definitely not going to be a cheap month. i'm really excited for everyone to come back home! i am in desperate need to go to the beach since im getting pastey kine white! basically so far this week, i've been working choke. it was a good weekend since i made a lot of money. i was losing faith in my job and when i finally made a bill on thursday i felt much better :) it doesnt really feel like christmas is coming up. not too much christmas spirit around since not a lot of places are decorated yet. i think by the state capital they are using LED lights. it looks so yucky! its like a blueish tinge light....tch, damn the economy!

the great aloha run is also coming up in about two months and sign ups are happening. time to get on top of that. this past year i ran it to get over someone. the previous time before that i ran it for the one i loved. what would next year's run be for??

farewell november

so this long weekend has been pretty junk. it was fairly eventful in good ways yet way too many bad things have piled up to make it painfully long. my thanksgiving was nice so thursday was good. friday, i waited for FIVE hours in walmart for a nintendo ds lite...for myself. which made matters worst was forgetting my cellphone in my car, an ipod without battery life, and no one accompanying me. ally and codi were at walmart as well but on the other side waiting for cameras. they checked up on me time to time but i was antsy each time. work all weekend sucked. no one felt thankful after thanksgiving apparently. today i ran over a metal peg on by the curb while parking and it poked a hole in my tire. i just stared at it in disbelief. i had no idea every car carries a spare tire with tools. lesson today, i learned how to change a spare tire. decided to get all new tires which set me back another $350 in costs. december is gonna be one expensive ass month.

so november, i wrap you up with nothing but unfortunate memories. thanks for owning me.

give thanks

here is a list of all the things i am thankful for.

• God. thank You for giving me life and Your unconditional love for me even though i am a screw up

• friends and family. give or take some exceptions with current situations...but yeah. thank you for all the great memories and you guys stuck out with me through thick and thin <3>

• my educmakashun. thats important right???

• my job for giving me money to support my ass through such tough financial times with my family. also it feeds me.

• the boy toy. even tho the future is uncertain with him, he's been there for me quite a lot.

• good health, though i don't have insurance and im sick atm. gg.

• to have a car to drive around daily

• flushing toilets - i even wrote a journal entry on toilets for ms. lusk's class.

• birth control

• *wild card*

dying

so its two days before thanksgiving and i am sick. i think i have the cold and i really hope it doesnt get worst. so far my throat is sore, i have headaches, i am hypersensitive to touch, and my tummy doesn't wanna hold food. the tummy thing might be a good thing since it won't make me fat. i better be better by tomorrow night since it is the phuket thai thanksgiving party. its gonna be weird with the other locations coming over since we dunno any of them. i hope my tummy wont fail me! still dunno what to do for thanksgiving but i hope it will be good. black friday seems to be calling my name except i don't really have anything to buy. i'm not sure what to get for people. blehhhh. ill update later.

LOLcat for you!

little splurges

so the other day i got myself a pedicure. i love it!! i highly recommend smiley nails to whoever is reading this lol. it was $20 for the pedicure but i wanted a flower design as well so total it was $26 excluding tip. too bad it was pouring so it was pretty hard walking back to my car. jj bakery was a delight with allison. poor thing she had to suffer in the rain with me..lol

that night was crazy as well. erin and i were suppose to go to the W hotel but that plan didn't follow through so instead we drank at my place. lauren decided to bring monopoly but we weren't coherent enough to keep up with the game lol. the rest of the night was interesting but ill spare details.

i think i may be coming down with something. my throat is scratchy and its starting to piss me off. i dont wanna get sick since i dont even know if i have insurance or not. working kinda sucks. sometimes i find myself asking what's the purpose of doing this?? i feel like a robot just doing my thing to earn a couple dollars in tips. idk.

sometimes i wanna go back to school on the mainland. i miss the activities since my life is so dull back home. its comfortable and more productive i suppose but it's just losing its luster. and to add to this paragraph, im going to get myself a ds lite on black friday. yay!

near to you

idk what else to name this blog entry except for the song i am listening to at the moment. it is by a fine frenzy. they write the saddest songs ever.

it is almost thanksgiving. i have absolutely no idea what to do for that holiday. i hope my mom close the restaurant that day and cook me food. i miss her cooking. phuket thai is having a thanksgiving party the day before so we'll see how that goes. school is starting to wind down so that is a good thing, still so much left to do though. registration starts in about two weeks and i still have no idea what to take. i dunno if i should stick with four classes or five. i'm sure i'll be able to handle five since none of my classes look THAT difficult.

work today was gay. restaurant closed at 10 pm and i didn't leave until 11:45. mainly due to a large party that didn't leave right away AND we cannot count pass 5. there are suppose to be 6 trays but we couldn't find the last one. it was where it belonged the entire time but we just miscounted -_-. lame.

twilight the movie seems to be highly anticipated. i have no freakin clue what its about. is it like harry potter? i know its about vampires or something but frick, thats all i know haha. what's so good about it? someone please clue me in D:

i'm still super confused with another aspect of my life. i guess i really wanna be near but keeping safe distance as well. it is everything i want but so much i don't need to deal with. everything is torn.

sun circus

today was the cirque du soleil performance. it was AMAZING!! probably the best $15 i've spent in awhile. if you wanna do something different and its inexpensive (about $40 per ticket), i highly recommend this! its astonishing to see how strong these people are! the guys in the performance are ripped like no other. *drool* haha. it was my first friday night off in forever and it was pretty eh after the show. just ate dinner at the food court with some friends and the sony expo. i was suppose to go to the gym but that seems to be a no go. whatevers.

its starting to look a lot like christmas and thanksgiving didn't even come yet lol. i hope this winter season will be more "warming" than last. since everyone seem to have a wish list on their blog, i might as well too :D here is my wish list:

• Nintendo DS Lite
• iPod nano 8 gb
  
• Swim suit
• Business suit
• Pencil case - thanks sunny
• Haircut at J Salon
• A spa treatment (massage and or pedicure is all i need :D) - i got a pedi

yeah i'm not really a material person...except maybe the first two haha. i doubt ill get anyone to buy those for me so ill just suck it up and be INDEPENDENT as usual.

EDIT: so i went to xyloh's last night and it was a RAVE. i was so confused as to what was going on and even had to pay cover for the first time...$15! there were kids of all ages there and like half the ppl were rolling. man, i wanna be where they are if i ever go to another one of these things

countdown

this week has been condensed into these three days. it kinda sucked since i was still in vacation mode so now im busting ass by writing this blog of how hard i should be studying. ive been studying for TIM for awhile but i don't feel all that prepared. the material is pretty straightforward so i hope to do fine. tomorrow i have my executive interview for my other TIM class...everyone i have talked to from that class has done it except me. whyyy?? friday i have a quiz for chinese and astronomy and my interview essay is due. damn it. but at least i got off from work to watch a cirque du soleil performance! yay!!

i finally got a new phone. its the nokia music xpress something in silver. it's really nice to look at but technologically challenged me is having problems haha. it's so cool i can create my own ring tones and it comes with a music player. did i mention it has guitar hero as a game?! nice touch on that one ;) but the menus and stuff is super plain so bleh. you win some and lose some i guess.

the holiday seasons are approaching. i get really lonely during thanksgiving and christmas. i think the main reason being my family is so out of the loop with one another and we don't really make a big deal out of them. i can't wait to spend it with friends though. it's been almost a year since i've had this blog, time sure goes by fast. about a month or so left of school. i'm dreading winter break but yet look forward to it. there are so many reasons to it...sigh.

PS: i don't like how my iTunes work now. the main music menu is all confusing or is it just me?? help?

pink party

last night was the pink party. it was definitely a lot more fun than i expected. xyloh was lame for having the half off drinks only until 11. by the time we got there, it was over -_-. it was ok, i spent money but got a bunch of free drinks as well. i wore my stiletto heels. they were hella sexy but beauty knows no pain. i couldn't feel my toes after i took them off. they literally went numb for a good hour or so. that night just got progressively more interesting. but it all worked out in the end.

i've been really slacking off for TIM. my exam is this thursday and i havent' really absorbed much info. i hope im not overconfident cuz then ill prolly fail it again..ugh! i went to sandy's earlier today and brought my books to read. i felt SUPER dorky and i was distracted big time with all the ppl in the water and the sounds of the waves. ok tomorrow im gonna be MIA to study and get all my shit together for school T_T.

your talk is cheap

i finally attended my first TIMSA meeting. man, i guess i won't be able to make the free dinner thing they offer since i'm not quite an active member since i did not attend one of every event. poop. i hope the ones i do go to this month will be fun :) we're down to one more month of school. it went by pretty fast but i don't feel as accomplished since i have been lazy all semester long. i fell asleep in astronomy today and i felt i was the ONLY one asleep. i woke up with drool stains and all. i mean, why didn't anyone else sleep, do they actually find that class exciting?!?! idk.

people shouldn't say things they don't mean. most guys are all talk and no show and i can spot those out so easily. i like to hear it and believe its all true. but i've got plans up my sleeve since everyone has ulterior motives despite what one says. then again, i've been convincing myself to think one way for so long i'm starting to believe myself. this mindset of mines can't seem to be shaken off for some reason and it's pretty irritating. i want to be accepting again but i've still got a lot of learning to do still.

with this, i bring you guys back to old school with this song.

autumn

happy november!! election day is coming up, along with a bunch of work that must be done for school X_X

halloween was yesterday and i had the most hectic day. had only like 2 hours of sleep and ran around running errands and what not before work. work was oddly busy which sucked since i didnt even make any money! went to xyloh but didn't drink too much since it was late. i didnt have to buy any of my drinks which was prety cool :) cruised waikiki for a little bit but i had to leave since i was in desperate need to use the potty. lame. but overall, this was probably my most eventful halloween :D also it was my first time dressing up in a full on costume. i was a frou frou princess but actually i was the deadly sin "pride" but whatevers. lol

work today sucked. rinse and repeat tomorrow.

little japanese girls

today was my "volunteer" thingy with big brothers and big sisters. i had to take a group of japanese high school students around; basically walk them from waikiki to ala moana. for the three hours i get paid $50 (my only incentive). let's just say this was a great experience and i felt almost bad for getting paid. i had a group of ten girls and they were SO CUTE! well, maybe they weren't the most prettiest but they had great personalities! they kept complimenting me how pretty i was and such and asking me questions. i ran into a classmate of mines in waikiki and he gave me a hug. the girls were all ooohing and ahhing and asked if he was my boyfriend. adorable. the walk was freakishly long and definitely tiring. they gave me a present in the end and i thought it was so nice of them. because of the gift, i felt terrible this gig was for money. i started to miss my girls after we parted ways almost immediately since our three hours together were spent bonding and walking. i will definitely do this again!

astrological truth?

today's horoscope 10/27/08 - libra

A personal relationship that you've been struggling with will finally start to feel like it's back in balance again today. They had their issues, you had yours -- and now it looks like you are both back on the same page again. Try to get together with this person today and just be normal with them again. Keep the conversation light, and don't rehash the same things you have been rehashing. You both need and deserve a break from all of that heavy, introspective stuff.

man this stuff is usually on the dot. i dont like believing in them but i just cant help but wonder.

so earlier today i was talking to sheldon...well more like complaining about how so many good things leave me. he sent me an inspirational fortune cookie text. :D "Good things don't leave you in the end. I'll be back." AHHH! sweetest thing EVER. he's seriously the ideal boyfriend in my books. guys should take notes on him

if i were a boy

this is beyonce's new song and it is SO true. i wish guys and girls can switch places for a bit to see how hard it is to be the girl in the relationship since girls aren't programmed like dudes. after listening to it a few more times i cried. blehh, what a softie. ciara also made a similar song "like a boy." it basically has the same message but in a hip hoppity way. man, life would be easy being a guy, then again, maybe not.

this is the best text message i had in a super long time from leon. "then life would be too easy."
why is it so good? its so simple yet it is straight to the point. i really like when people just straight out tell me things. another good example is suveg's "you're an idiot" speech. love it!

j'adore moi

life is starting to pick up. im leaving certain pieces the way they are and i've basically stopped caring so much for them. man, this post is giving me de ja vu of another post when i went through similar experiences. geez, my life is so repeitive lol. the weekend is finally here and its been a damn long week. i need to get packing to move over to my moms place but the only humbug thing is the car issue. i would have to walk back and forth to my car at my dads which basically defeats the purpose of me going to my moms its so i could have more freedom without walking around middle of the night -_- i love this. hmm...im so excited to see where the future takes me.

oh and just for fun, kevin sent a link of a youtube video to a few ppl via EMAIL! i thought it was SO CUTE cuz its like what old people do...send little random fun emails to everyone :P

ill definitely update more later. until then, over and out :)

save me

this is a very personal blog. it involves the people i care most for...

i've never felt more alone in my life. sure, i've felt this way in vegas but at least i knew i had friends from all around who loves me and a family welcoming me back home with open arms. now its a complete 180. my dad has recently turned physically abusive on me since he has a problem with me when im home and when im not. he's been kicking me out of the house and hitting me with anything he can get his hands on. him being my dad and super old, what could i really do but defend myself?? im too scared to hit him back since it might cause real damage but my body has been battered by this crazy spree of his. im scared just to be around him when its night time because he is another person...like a werewolf or something. moving to my mom's place won't help a lot either. the apartment is small and clustered. my mom is almost never home due to her restaurant job and my sister is always with her boyfriend. basically i'll be by myself most of the time. my friends, well, i feel so distant from everyone. its nothing how i came home to now. they say "who cares about family when you got friends." it was true at one point but not so much now since i dont even know who's got my back. i hate to say this but all the stupid drama that's been happening within our group of friends has clearly split up everyone. i feel like im caught in the middle of the split with nowhere to belong.. the boy? let's just say nothing is set in stone with him. i can't believe i let my guard down for a short while to find i should've kept it up all along. he has been my saving grace since this has all started but i still refuse to let him be that impacting to my life. i am an emotional wreck right now. i was so close to letting my demons get back to me but i know its only temporary relief. how do i attract so much trouble? why does the worst seem to happen to me? maybe i'm just overexxagerating but it seems as though i always face hard times. i dont know what else more to say. im sorry for this very personal rant and if you made it to reading it, please don't feel sorry for me. just be there for me cuz i need you more than anything else.

ms. ginoza

if you guys don't already know, i love my fourth grade teacher, ms. ginoza. she has inspired me in so many ways but unfortunately i cant remember them all since it was so long ago. usually when i have something for school to write about a teacher, it would be her. i just had a really great fourth grade experience even though i dreaded having her at first when i've heard stories. it was such a nice surprise bumping into her again in my elevator since its been so long since i've last seen her there. yeah, she lives in the same building as me since i first moved there. she mentioned that she won an award for my letter i wrote about her back in high school. thinking hard and way back, i did. i wrote a letter to my favorite teacher for lex brody's "thank you very much" competition. my name got inputted into the registry and she got nominated for an award which she won. how exciting to know my letter has won my teacher an award :) i don't know what else to say but THANK YOU MS. GINOZA! i can't think of another teacher which such impact in my life.

soundtrack of my life

i really hate katy perry's song "i kissed a girl" but i love all her other songs. it matches my life SO well. i really like her song "i think i'm ready" and "i'm still breathing" idk, who would've thought she could sing so many cute songs about love when she kisses girls with cherry chapstick. go figure. i am still in love with the maroon 5 cover of "if i fell" it is the perfect song of the moment. it's always on replay nonstop. i hope these songs don't fail me cuz i get giddy listening to them.

im glad i got the emotions outta someone but in a not so good way. i need to learn to rephrase my thoughts into something that makes sense. i hope i can make it right cuz i actually feel really bad about it. if anyone noticed, i hardly say "sorry." i say "my bad" a lot because i don't wanna desensitize the word. but i think i might have to bust out that word X_X. damn.

TIM 101 is still kicking my ass. i studied all today for it, kinda. i went to the gym and walked off 300 calories in 2 miles and read over 40 powerpoint slides. gg. i WILL do well on that test! because of TIM, i am neglecting my chinese test that is actually tomorrow. blahh school! it blows.

the big 2-0

THANK YOU to everyone who has written on my wall on facebook, text messaged, called or anything to wish me a happy birthday! i really appreciated it since my family forgot lol. oh yes, thanks for all the wonderful presents!! thanks for keeping it simple since that was all i asked for. it was the most eventful birthday i've had since maybe high school.

recap of my birthday:

• i had trouble sleeping the night before so i was up until 4 am just praying to fall asleep
• went out bright and early to eat breakfast
• went to school, good fun...not really.
• ate at verbanos with my buddies :D thanks for dinner and cake(s)!!!
• won best outta 7 games of pool. who's the champion?! i am.
  
• met up with my coworkers since it was my boss's birthday like the day after mine or something
• took 7 shots and was feeling pretty damn good ;)
• got 3 hours of sleep and went to school the very next morning like a trooper.

ill add some pictures later. but anyways, THANK YOU SOOOOOOO MUCH FOR MAKING THIS BIRTHDAY MOST MEMORABLE!!! I AM SO GRATEFUL TO HAVE FRIENDS LIKE YOU GUYS!!! LOVE YA! <3

silly family

i had a hunch my family forgot it is my birthday tomorrow. below are the conversations i had with my family about ten minutes ago.

me: "hey daddy, what day is tomorrow?"
dad: "its the 7th, tuesday!"
me: "yeah, so what day is it??"
dad: "tuesday, check the calendar, wait let me look for my clock"
me: "WHAT DAY IS IT!?"
dad: "it's the 7th!"
me: "ITS MY BIRTHDAY!!"
-then he starts talking about HIS birthday which is a few days after mine...

me: "hey mommy, what day is it tomorrow??"
mom: "its tuesday right?"
me: "annnnd??"
mom: "wait hold on" *puts me on hold*
mom: "its the 7th, tuesday, what about it??"
me: "omg, its my BIRTHDAY!! you forgot AGAIN?!"
mom: "ohhhh thats right! invite your friends to the restaurant for dinner!"
me: "too late i have reservations..."
mom: "im busy right now, ttyl bye"

me: "hey what day is it tomorrow?"
sister: "idk tuesday?"
me: "soooo what day is it?!"
sister: "its the 7th."
me: "so what day is it???"
sister: "ITS TUESDAY the 7th!! i dont get it!"
me: "WHAT DAY IS IT?!?!"
sister: "shit idk! the 7th!! your birthday???"
me: "YES!!! wtf you forgot too?"
sister: "when was the last time i ever celebrated your birthday? i don't do anything on mines."
me: "at least i remember!"
sister: "your birthday is weird,10/7 to 5/5"
me: "at least say happy birthday..."
sister: "fine ill text you at midnight"
me: "good enough."

seriously...at least im here in hawaii to drill them about it, better than last year when no family member called me to wish me happy birthday. i had to call a couple of days later to remind them -_-

just a post

yesterday was fun. gina, mel, sunny, and i went hiking. for a supposedly easy hike, it was pretty damn strenuous. i was watching my sweat drip from my face lol. we met up with ally and ate lunch. it was funny since all of us weren't that hungry and wanted something light but we ended up at CPK -_-. it was nice to have a girl outing again since its been so long.

work has been pretty good the last couple of days. friday night was super busy and i was able to make a lot which was good. saturday wasn't as fun and i was dying kine tired. but after work i went to a bar and yeah, im pretty much falling asleep as i write this right now. i'll add more to this post later but i'll leave you with this song that i am currently in love with. oh adam, you make my heart melt...



update: today i just feel so lethargic. like i told myself to go to the gym but my motivation basically hit rock bottom. even now i feel so empty. idk why i feel like this as of lately. my viewpoint is like this to everyone and i dont know why but i really dont like it. perhaps i just need a hug and get over it.

grace kelly

i am addicted to this song by mika. it's so catchy and it reminds me of the movie "what happens in vegas." i think that movie beats me watching enchanted twice in a row in a day since i saw that movie like 3 times within 2 weeks. but its good :)

im uncertain with a lot of things now but i must put my chin up and get through with everything. hell, its my burfday soon! and i am going skydiving mother fathers! i hope i dont chicken out X_X i don't think this birthday will be exciting as my other ones but definitely will be better than last years. yay!

dementia

my dad is literally driving me off the walls. he is seriously going through dementia or paranoia of some sort. last night he stood guard of the door so i cant get out...like seriously. i won't get into more details of my dad but he needs to chillax but i cant blame it cuz he's prolly senile or something. ughhhh i wanna stay with my mom but the whole moving out process is sooooo unflattering. idk we shall see where this leads because i feel bad shunning my dad for being so crazy this weekend but im not up for talking to him.

damn it, i dropped my guard and now i cant seem to pick it back up! poopers. my birthday is in a little more than week...idk what i wanna do for it. skydiving.

first F

i got my first F on a test in college. i don't feel TOO bad about it cuz the highest grade was a 76 so its gonna be curved so i hope that F turns into a C at least. whichever the case, i will buckle down and study harder. none of these Ds and Fs anymore for me.

worst week EVER.

ok this week has just been pretty crappy. lets recap shall we?

• pretty sure i did bad on my TIM test, pretty damn hard for an intro class!!
• thought about dropping accounting and i did
• got a C on my chinese quiz cuz i cant read instructions
• failed my astronomy quiz with a 4/10, WOW
• got into a huge fight with my dad so i slept over somewhere else
• sprained my pinky defending myself from my dad
• borrowed the boy's car to go to school so he had to take the shuttle to kaneohe and back
• dad suspended my cell phone but im smart enough to reinstate it :)
• ate a bunch of zippy's food to make myself feel better on friday
  
• found some dirty laundry and secrets that makes me feel uneasy
• feel distant from a lot of my friends D:

theyre in no particular order cuz it started to get sloppy after the academic fails. like i went to work with my pinky out cuz it was so sore and i was pretty darn pissy. it could only get better and it is picking up for the most part.

after the rain comes the sun..

flipping the leaf

starting from this moment i am going to be a better friend! if you got my back, ill always have yours through anything. please be there for me... i wish things were the way they used to be in hawaii, like when i first came back from vegas. it was really nice and familiar for the most part and now it seems like so many people have lost touch and went their separate ways. i miss it. but yeah, im going to be a better person and friend. i wish i could take a retreat for just a little bit to get away from life.

catch myself

today i made my first milestone. i cut hair! thats right folks, i cut a fricken mohawk wanna be thingy! cheehee. i didnt know what i was doing but it came out alright. oh and i must catch myself before i fall too deep into doo doo. so sad everyone is leaving in less than a week. i need to get doodoo brown cuz im hecka white right now. i hate all this hazy vog shit. its pissing me off.

random post, i know

update: NO leon, i didnt cut my own hair cuz thats fucked up. haha.

(ok this part right here is gonna be a little more personal cuz i need to vent and im too lazy to record it on my regular journal)
mr. man, you are such a sweet dude. too bad you remind me so much of dickface but just not as mean. from your chin hairs, dislike of tomatoes, the love of the water, twitches, hats, and a sibling 5 years apart. GOSH! the list goes on. you and i work together well but there is so much emotional baggage that comes with our "whatever this is relationship." i told myself to not fall but you are one smooth mofo. idk if what you are saying to me is sweet talk or what but im not sure if its working or not. please don't break my heart, i can't handle it anymore. you told me to keep my guard up since you don't know what you want so why are you treating me like this? its like you want to prove to the world you are easy to fall in love with but i want to prove you wrong. don't get too conceited now since two can play this game since i'm pretty damn vain as well. perhaps we're both in it deeper than we thought...

blue

wow its been awhile since i last posted something. school sucks as usual but im making the most of it. something kinda good happened in my life but now im not too sure. its making me feel really down along with other situations. its a weird feeling but ive never felt so alone in my life. its a constant nagging sensation in me thats depressing me. the urge to cry is overwhelming but my body wont allow it. damn it. im going to be so sad once the last of my mainland peeps leave. i miss all the ones that left so much!! i dont think i have ever missed my friends this much!

on another note, the economy sucks! last night at work no one wanted to tip well -_-

workaholic poker champ

all weekend long, i spent my life working. two of those shifts werent even by choice. seriously, how could two people be out of commission on the same day, thus, bumping me up from hostess to server on a saturday. UGH. whatevers, i made money but it sucked since i didn't even see any of my friends except for jen at phuket and when we went beach. anyhoo, sunday night i went to play poker with my coworker's friends. the stakes were soooooo high it was ridiculous! i was scared playing since everyone kept buying it with the minimum of $10. i didn't buy my first round but i stayed in the entire time. my coworker didn't get so lucky. by 1 AM, we decided to dig out and i was able to walk away with $65 :D i've never really won a big poker game before and i was so proud of myself! well, i really did have my coworker to thank cuz he was coaching me when he didn't have any cards but hey, i'd split it if he didnt have to owe me so much money lol.

note to self: please get that scholarship to UH asap! and deposit your paychecks.

to my fans...

dear readers,

thank you so much for reading my blog. especially kevin and leon for leaving occasional comments. i miss getting comments. yes, this entry goes out for everyone who reads this blog because it means you have some slight interest in my quirky life. at least it gives you folks something to do when you are bored online. and now i leave you with another LOLcat.

love,
michelle

PS: check out my new video on the left

what's your fantasy?

happy september!!! man the year is sure flying by fast. today is labor day and im stuck doing lots and lots of homework today. rawr. at least i had my share of fun on sunday!!

amanda, jen, and i did lunch for the first time in a long time at kit n kitchen. since sunday night was xyloh's baby blue and bling themed night, we were on a mission to find blue colored clothes. turned out jean's warehouse was 50% off all dresses, i should've both a bunch more. work was alright. i had a little apprentice to do all my work but i just had to supervise which sucks cuz i just watch patiently. xyloh was SO random. there were mardi gra beads, fish, glow sticks, a dance off, flying money, and a lot of haoles! hahaha so random! it was fun nonetheless. i left a little earlier to meet up with my coworkers at a bar and that was pretty much it.

saturday night i did basically nothing except get high off my mind. i need to stop smoking cuz its making me stupid. friday i vegged out at home like no other! i went to play pool like around 1 am with a friend and his brother, whoohoo!

now here is my philosophical part of my blog. there was something i secretly wanted but didn't care if i got it or not. but some random turn of events my so called fantasy came true. maybe it's not exactly what i had in mind but yeah. i wonder how things would be like now. i was never really good at juggling...

update: after some thinking today, what exactly am i good for? maybe some people just aren't who i want them to be and i do not believe in changing others to fit my lifestyles or vice versa. i guess i see where a certain person's intentions are and its always the same. time to do the right thing.

new school blues

maybe because im still new to UH but i find the campus really depressing. im not used to seeing so many people i know at school since i was away in the mainland and kcc there's only a small handful of people i know. even people tell me it's weird to see me around campus and i feel the same way. i see people i don't wanna see all the time and it kinda bothers me but i'm sure i'll get used to it. so far my classes are pretty good and it should be fun i hope. i've decided to join the TIM club but i want someone to join with me! lol. it just hit me now that it's depressing because its a huge campus and there is so many people and i feel so alone! haha there you go.

i have work tomorrow and that would probably be the highlight of my day. if my boss starts giving me shit again, ugh i will say something. he is driving me to the brink of quitting since it seems like he is only picking on me! all night i was listening to emo music from secondhand serenade. i was all sensitive to everything and it was lame haha. now im listening to delta goodrem and her songs aren't happier either. i need motivation and inspiration for school. im lagging still, prolly just need to sleep earlier or something. i like parking at the faculty area, i don't care if its far away and i have to shuttle. its less walking than if i parked around campus haha. major laziness right there.

and now another LOL cat:

Lost Freshman??

more like lost transfer student! first day at UH wasnt too bad. it's just a lot busier than KCC but so far i like my classes. tomorrow is definitely another day so hopefully it wont be too bad. my chinese teacher has such a heavy chinese accent that i cant even understand her english, damn. tomorrow might suck cuz im gonna spend about 7 hours on campus...whoohoo. i still need a definite way of getting to school cuz i know i wont get lucky that often with parking as i did today.

i watched lion king 2 tonight. this is what i get for finding movies online cuz it totally cut off the climax. like how did that koru lion get his scar and why was simba so mad?!?! lame but whatevers, beggars cant be choosers. i think the first lion king was much better. now im curious as how the third one is like.

for IBY i joined a comp that requires me to take a picture of myself everyday for a year, i should make a video of all my pictures afterwards, be like that guy that did it for like 3 years or something idk.

awkward goodbyes..

so basically, everyone is leaving or has left this week. it is so sad since summer has come and gone so fast. this past week has been pretty eventful with our island adventures and whatnot. i have not seen anyone off this summer and i think its best that way since i hate the awkwardness of it. its the saddest thing to see someone walk away so i guess from now on its just whenever i see the person last will be my bye. until the next time we meet, i hope we can keep in touch and i will definitely miss all of you.

i also checked out Kids in Sandbox. ok i didn't think that contraption is THAT big! i felt sorry for my invisible dick. that lady is demonic and that guy is a retard. good times i guess for them.

school is starting in a couple of days and i am still scared shitless. idk how to get there and i barely even know where my classes are! ANNNNNND i dont even have my books yet! GREAT.

spitting cave

today in the day time was GAY! i hate mondays now and this proves why:
i woke up late to register for my classes but excited nonetheless cuz FINALLY after three agonizing months i am able to register! but wait! one of my classes were full but that was the least of my worries! i have a registration hold because i didn't turn in my health clearance. normally it'll be no big deal, ill just head over to turn it in but my problem today was i couldn't find my damn TB shot papers! i was in panic mode since i would be screwed if i didn't have it. finally found it after an hour of desperate searching. before heading home i went and got a massive amount of yogurt to make myself feel better. came home registered and BAM! i have another hold for my accounting class. DAMN IT! now i have to go to UH again tomorrow to straighten that shit up.

tonight was fun tho. jen took us to spitting caves and it was pretty awesome. the spot was really chill and the one cave could amuse me for hours. after that darryl, kevin, and i went to brian's and played a couple rounds of pool. i whooped both their asses the first game but the second one darryl won but all three of us were crashing and burning cuz we sucked the second game.

summer is getting colder..

this summer kinda sucks overall. it had its ups but it just wasn't eventful whatsoever. my weekly routine would be like this, eat, work, sleep, club, and sleep some more. in no particular order of course. i have a week left and i am determined to make the most of it. i am finally done with champions. my last night sucked. it was busy and i didn't even make that much money. you can definitely tell if a table isn't going to tip and i had one of those. they might as well shouldn't have left me a measly six dollars. whatevers.

last night we went fishing! olivia caught a little guppy fishy and named it dinky. gina on the other hand was a fisherman in her past life cuz she caught everything with that net -_- haha. that was nice to do something different for a change.

on a side note, i hate people that lies. that is all :D

here is a picture of olivia's dinky:

porcelain gods

did some medium amounts of drinking on thursday night as from my previous post. FRIDAY night is another story. we went to venus and i got TRASHED outta my mind. i was kissing guys and girls and guys and girls. like wtf. i dont even remember much that happened except drinking a butt load. sucken gwen for saying she can drive my ass home if i get wasted. rawr.

let's just say the following day i was in too much pain to live. threw up ALL day long baby! i went to work slightly hung over and i even went clubbing AGAIN afterwards at xyloh's. i walked in and the smell of alcohol hit me like a wall and i was grossed out. a coworker of mine bought me a shot and like the trooper i am, i took it. the dickface of my life was there and that didnt help my case. i wanted to leave asap but i just rode it out for an hour. danced a little with that coworker and he seriously made my night. thank you.

today at work i was just dead tired. too much partying and such. after work i went to a friends house to watch the orphanage and it wasn't as scary as i thought. i was suppose to watch step brothers but i decided to stay home. not a bad idea cuz its been awhile since ive been homebound.

i wanna go fast!

last night i went motorcycle riding with a former coworker. it was sooooo much fun! it brought back a little memories since i used to ride with my uncles when i was younger in china. he took me to pearlridge and we ate at cpk. went to dave and busters after. really lame for me since i was under 21. they were really strict there last night cuz they scolded me that if i have any alcohol they will kick everyone in the party out. geez. then we went to a bar in waikiki after.

my mommy woke me up to help her out at the restaurant. blahhh. free labor for reals. i want to help my mom but our language barrier and ways of conducting business is so conflicting! it really annoys me how my mom is so loud and ditzy -_-. my mom gave me all the tips we made that afternoon but i didnt want it but she insisted. whoohoo, $11, im ballin' now! haha.

the other night we watched the mummy 3. it was alright but im more bias since its half chinese. lol. summer is going by way too fast. this is my first week without work and its already half over. im not doing enough productive things in the day time since i wake up so late. i need to get my ass to a beach or something asap.

update: so a few of us went to phuket thai for dinner. the food is was pretty good as usual. i got leon another cake there so that was his 4th baked birthday good for the week. haha lucky guy. after dinner we went to champions! my paranoia definitely got the best of me cuz i hate drinking there since im not suppose to. jen was the champion of the night of course. girl drank more than any of us but then again, she isnt driving. my coworker kidnapped me to go to queen bee's, another bar, for the owner of phuket thai's birthday. i had 3 shots there and left. idk why i cant seem to get drunk anymore...maybe because i know im driving. junk.

lettuce wraps

last night was fun. olivia, leon, and i went to first friday. it was pretty cool to check out the different galleries. i think my favorite piece was the guy that lived off the earth and wanted to trade other ppl for food. it was really cool and inspirational. afterwards we ate at camellia. holy crap, i wish i had my high school appetite. i ate to the point of throwing up. it was so damn good tho! i got juked by the red bean porridge. chinese version of it is sweet and i was so craving that til i took a bite of it and it was SALTY! damn it. chilled at mikey's house after. i was so damn full but i still drank beer. what a fatty.

today i went to my mommy's restaurant cuz its the grand opening! my aunty and mom work like headless chickens. kinda unorganized but i hope it gets better. the food is alright, typical chinese stuff so i really hope they do well. the restaurant gig is seriously my mom's mid life crisis call. its like she's 50 and just wanna do something BIG in her life. she threw away her career and spent all her savings to open a restaurant with my uncle. sigh...please let it work out X_X!

oh yes, HAPPY BIRTHDAY LUKE YOSHIDA!!!

on a side note: not having toilet paper really sucks. i had that problem for a day, never again!

say what?!

happy august!

not much has happened to me as of lately. there were a few surprises work-wise that pissed me off. for example, this past tuesday i was on call and i had to work. i was MAD. ask olivia or samson cuz i was on the brink of tears when my manager told me to go in. after work i just swore left and right cuz i was so irritated. whatevers, i made money thats all that matters i guess. my last day of champions is suppose to be august 14th but there were change of plans. today was my last day since the owner didn't want to schedule me on the next payroll schedule. like wtf. i told him my last day was the 14th and i was so shocked he didnt even tell me he would be cutting it early. i had plans for ppl to come by that day so he let me work on the 14th. i guess im free next thursday!

tomorrow im going to finally attend first friday. its been something ive been wanting to do for a really long time. after first friday its camellia's buffet! whoohoo! havent eaten there in ages! cant wait to stuff my face with yakiniku stuff.

before i forget, the other day kevin, olivia, luke and i ate a cheesecake factory. omg, the $1.50 cheesecake was heaven. sucken leon for being chang and lazy to go with us. definitely missed out since a regular slice could go between $6.50-7.50. definitely a steal. we went to luke's house afterwards and i got to play apples to apples. ok, for a really simple game it was a lot of fun! kevin got a little too happy with it the second round but it was good times :D hopefully my summer will end with a bang. i need to start registering for classes or at least plan them out since its almost my time. holy crap, the wait to register for transfer students is so ridiculous. not even worth it.

hauntings

people of my past are coming to haunt me or something. get outta my mind! maybe its a sign lol. idk why i cant stop thinking of them. i wish i could make my amends with all of them and just end everything on a good note though we may not speak to each anymore. there is ONE person that recently came to mind. i want to so badly just call you up to say hello but im scared. its a two way friendship and it kinda ended with the ball on your court. because of that, i have not taken any action to keep in touch. sigh...

i really like jesse mccartney's new album. i havent gotten it yet but ive been listening to some of his tracks on youtube. its pretty good. kinda reminds me of justin timberlake. his video "leavin" was depressing to watch haha. ill upload one of his videos. its called Told You So.

what's your drive?

what compels people to do what they do?

i found out something in my workplace that completely saddens me. my favorite dishwasher told me he lost all motivation to work because my manager canceled his insurance. he is the most hardworking person in the kitchen and is so helpful for all of the front of the house employees. its gonna be sad if he decides to quit.. idk why my manager would do that; greed? lack of funds? idk. sucks. on the topic of work, starting NEXT week i might pick up up shifts since i really want my coworker to move up to server as well. as for the bar, a few more weeks and im outta there. ill definitely miss my customers and the money sigh.

another thing kinda reminds me of my situation of last summer. man i miss it even though it was stressful and painful but at least i knew i kinda belonged somewhere. this relates to the title. what makes one do what one does?? seriously. maybe i should be a psychology major :P right now my compeller is to get skinny again. i eat and sleep waaaaay too much. ive been waking up at 1130 am - 12pm all week. my whole day seems wasted and that is a shame. i need to live it up a little better this summer.

my mommy is opening a restaurant soon. im pretty excited for her and i really hope it will do well since she invested a lot of money and time to it. she made me her little spy and go into a liquor store to check out beverage prices so she can get an idea. the shop owner obviously knew what i was doing, frick. so i bought a lighter with my drink purchase :/ whateverssss. i need to clean up my apartment. it is filthy beyond anything i can imagine. i dont even know which clothes are clean or dirty. im just gonna stuff them all in the washing machine.

LOLcats FTW.

just for fun

this post is for the sake of blogging. i shall recap events of the week

• got an A for accounting! whoohoo!
• getting fat cuz ive been going out too much and eating too late at night
• so mad that the birthday party i went to, the bday guy didnt even remember i was there. i smoked with him and everything -_-
• i got my eyebrows done. very archy for my preference but im sure it'll look better after a week
• scored half a bottle of wine cuz one of my tables couldnt finish it :)
• went to a hostess bar for the first time. NEVER could i get myself to do that kinda shit cuz its so demoralizing.

ill post more later. brain fart right now but ill leave you with this pic :)

club hoppin' tuesday

tuesday was crazy! i was out all night for amanda's birthday, ally's ear piercing, pipeline, scruples, and dennys. it was wild and a lot of fun drunken moments which resulted in watching the sunrise on my drive home. man, im torn between a situation that i seriously do NOT wanna get involved. its just more batchi for my life. frick.

wednesday i literally slept ALL DAY. the only time i was awake was to eat lunch with jen and going movies with vincent. love guru was an ok movie. they had some good meanings but it was just retardedly funny. kinda. we then went to mac 24/7 to get some food. i wanted pancakes but we knew we couldnt finish them so we got a veggie lasagna, chocolate cupcake, and banana split. so much sweet stuff.

thursday i worked at the bar and it was not that exciting. super dead but it was g. me and my coworkers went to evergreen for some drinks. now im typing this whole blog kinda buzzed. if my plan succeeds then ill be drinking a lot this week. the most ill drink any week of my life and it should be fine cuz i am young and lovin it!!! fuck.

crazy weekend

sooo friday was darryl and mikey's birthday dinner. tanaka of tokyo was definitely a place to go if im not paying for it! haha. pretty pricey and not a whole lot of food but it was good. afterwards we went to xyloh. VERY random decision to go but we went. it was pretty fun until i discovered someone tried to rob my car -_-. after the club gwen found my entire passenger window BROKEN! for some unknown reason i was relatively calm about it. i was reluctant to call the police since i was drinking earlier but i did anyways. it was useless to do so since my insurance doesnt even cover for the damage! gg geico. my dad got it fixed the next day and it cost $220.

saturday i went out for lunch with pauline, ning, and her friend britney. we went to phuket thai. haha im so sick of that place! went to work and it was pretty busy. idk, i didnt make that much money tho. i even got stiffed!! prolly because i forgot their chicken but still, at least leave me a dollar tip. went club AGAIN that night. it just wasnt that satisfying since i was there for only an hour and i dressed fly but it wasnt the same. oh wells. me and the girls made a road trip to the kahala zippys. the end of saturday night

sunday, jen, olivia, and i went to lanikai beach. it was different and it was pretty chill. afterwards we tried out lanikai juice. note to self: never get the amazon cherries cuz it sucks. we decided to check out pali lookout but it was cold haha.

on a serious note: i wish my life is a little more fulfilling. i feel like i want to just take a few months off and travel the world. i miss you but im too scared to approach you again. <----many many people that were in my life...

c-walk

so maybe its just me but i realize A LOT of asian kids can do the crip walk. its like....WHOA but kinda cool at the same time lol. due to IBY, ive turned into a web junkie and i find all the weirdest web trash out there. this has got to stop but i cant help but want to hit top 100. blahhhh.

im sooooo damn bored these days since im finally free from school and crazy work hours but everyone decides to pick up jobs and take classes. i played semi serious tennis for the first time in half a year. it was really fun to bring back my competitive side but my shoulder is sore now. yogurtland has apparently been the new "it" spot since you cant really go wrong with yogurt and its pretty cheap.

CONTINUATION:

went to the gym with jen and we took a shadow boxing and lifting class. holy crap, our arms are dead now. i miss taking boxing classes cuz theyre so much fun and you get a full body workout. the lifting class, not too much cuz its too slow for me.

i went to dinner with my mommy last night as well. it was like i went on a date with her cuz i took her to this indian place with a great ambiance. afterwards we went to yogurtland. yep, total date.

just like a boy

so today i pretty much lost my voice. this is gonna suck since i have to work at phuket thai tomorrow and its also 4th of july. at the bar i was screaming and shouting with my sexyful yet manly voice. people were feeling sorry for me because i was all out of it and i was forced to work since it was friggen busy. i took some nyquil so i hope that will give me some restful sleep so i will feel like a million bucks for the weekend :D

another surprise of a lifetime happened again today. well, i kinda had a funny feeling that it was coming but i dont like jumping into conclusions. it was GREAT nonetheless :) :) :)!!! oh yeah, i got a haircut. its nice once i can get it to work for me. also on a side note this is kinda ranting about someone. this person was kind of a fag today. the actions that occured kinda stamped PUSSY on the forehead. whateverrrrrrrs...people need to chillax and pull sticks outta their asses.

OK time to sleep since its alread 3 am and i need to wake up. YUCK.

kung fu

happy july!!!

so the past three movies ive seen all have a common theme and it is to train a loser fellow into something great. those movies were Wanted, Forbidden Kingdom, and Kung Fu Panda. after watching those movies i felt inspired to learn to defend myself haha. wanted was ok but i think i wouldve been happier watching wall-e. the writers for forbidden kingdom seemed to have written the script off proverbs from fortune cookies. ive never felt so chinese watching that but it was pretty good minus the white boy. kung fu panda was the best outta the three.

im seriously too spoiled to go back to work. this past week was so relaxing but i think i got sick...AGAIN. too much shouting and junk food. im gonna try get back into shape since i now have more time to hit the gym. yesterday, jeannie, annie, and i tried to hike diamond head but we didnt finish the hike. i mean we're hardcore hikers and we couldve made it to the top had it not been so damn hot or crowded so we just got lazy and turned back lol. i went running with kevin and leon that night. not a good idea because my legs are suffering today since it was too much activities in one day.

its starting to feel a lot like summer because summer is DONE OVER WITH TOMORROW!!! now i just really gotta study for my final. whateversssss, im sure ill do fine with minimal studying time! im also excited for 4th of july day even tho i work.

things on my mind:

• screwy internet cuz my dad is playing with my cords to work his tv box
• scratchy throat which i hope gets better by tomorrow
• spending WAY too much money when im not even making any for awhile
• started this whole list with the letter S. cool.
  

mmmkay.

my first weekend of no work is almost done. i guess work does really take up a lot of my time so it seemed really long though i didn't do too much. im finally done with server training so i am an officially a WAITRESS! w00t w00t!

recap of this weekend:

• got the surprise of a lifetime when olivia came home
• bon dance virgin devirgnized :D
• late night yanagi sushi run
• sushi king lunch date with sarah yi
• clubbingggg - nasty cuz the air con broke so we decided to leave after an hour or so
• first time eating at liliha bakery along with my first coco puff!!! (a lot of firsts)
  
• samson's birthday bbq!
  
• brownie baking as i type.

lots of firsts this weekend and its been pretty eventful :D last week of summer school and i am FREE!!! cant wait!!

funky virus

sooooooo i am sick once again. i have been catching this bug every two weeks for the past six weeks without fail. its weird but im finally on some antibiotics and i hope it'll be gone FOREVER! its so irritating to have to see the doctor so often especially since my insurance is going to expire in a week or so. yeah i dunno what ill do with myself without proper protection...sigh. i think im super duper dedicated to work. as sick as i was yesterday, it took me half an hour to decide to call in sick for work. like i didnt wanna hinder my performance had i gone to work but if i called in sick i didnt wanna prolong the training process. whatevers, i needed the night off cuz i slept the whole day and it felt GOOD.

i can barely speak without my throat burning. work tonight will be fun. i also need to stop eating and sleeping right after. its like i cant help it or something. soooo gay. ill prolly update later or something, im sleepy.

note to self:

• get doctors note
• buy a belt
• get mom to hem pants.
  

is it my turn yet?

server training has been going well. the things ive learned has helped me greatly at champions. im pretty excited to be done with training so i can just get on with the job. summer school is also starting to drag. i got a B- on my last test because i misread the instructions...so gay. i dont mind just taking a B for that course :) yeah with school and work, life is really routine. my weekly schedule consist of school, nap, hw, work, maybe more hw, rinse and repeat for four days. ugh.

something also made my world crashing a little and got me asking "is it my turn yet??" i try to be a patient person but im to the point where i just want it now! but good things happens to those who wait so yeah. until then i just gotta think super positive :D right now im home on a saturday night being super duper lame. ugh this sucks. i say ill do hw but i highly doubt ill do any tonight lol

don't give up

today was my first day of server training. it was terrible in my opinion but everyone seems to say otherwise. maybe ive set too many expectations for myself and didnt accomplish as much as i anticipated. i mean, it was father's day and it was fricken busy. i was detached from my trainer like half the night so i just did my own thing. i was pretty much doing my hostess job just in uniform. this large party made sure i got tips from her bill cuz i was a trainee. that was pretty nice of her :) yeah, after work i cried my way home. i dont want to give up but im already cracking under the pressure. its 12:44 am and i have an accounting test the next morning and i barely studied. screwed much??

this past weekend was relaxing. i was able to take off friday and i went out and sang karaoke! it was a lot of fun. saturday i went to my coworkers bday celebration at champions. it was very awkward for me to be there since i dug out of work on friday to "study" and i show up to party haha. it was alright i guess. i dont really care since i wanna quit there anyways. everyone else went to mac 24/7 for lanes bday. i wanna go there one day and eat pancakes half my size :D and earlier today leon bought a ps3. i bet he's tweaking right now as i type this.

S&M adventures...

...stands for SUVEG AND MICHELLE'S ADVENTURES!! sick minded ppl :P

this is a recap of my week so far:

TUESDAY:
suveg is back in town! because of him, i sacrificed precious nap time to go cruise with him! we went on the makapuu hike and makapuu beach. on the trail there was this dude we met by the name of steve. he was nice at first but then got a little creepy. he said suveg had the look of a model/actor because steve is a film producer from LA. he wanted to do a photo shoot of him and give us a "thrill at night" when he does his ghost tours. yeah...it was weird. good times tho. we decided to go to makapuu beach cuz we saw it from the top of the hike and we flipped a coin to go. good choice cuz its a really really nice beach. it wasnt an asian beach since ppl there were either super moke or really california haole type. weird.

later that day i went to work. my manager said after this week im gonna be done with my cashiering job and i was depressed. i really love my job and didnt want it to end so abruptly. later on that night it turns out im gonna be working six days cuz he still needed me for training. this means i will be working SEVEN days for the next two weeks or so. frick.

i guess in my mind about moving up at phuket thai is that im leaving a position i love to another position i may potentially hate. i don't always enjoy waitressing at the bar so im afraid i might develop the same feelings for phuket. im terrified but i can only hope for the best :)

WEDNESDAY:
went out for lunch with my lovely ladies: ally, sarah, melanie, gina, sunny, and codi! we ate korean black bean noodles and it was yummy. what was even yummier was the dessert we got afterwards! it was an azuki shave ice with fruits. man that was delicious!!! i had to rush to meet up with some unlv peeps for a pool party thingy. my friend lives all the way in hawaii kai and i realized ive driven out there way too many times this summer. i need a change of hiking trails and beach. it was nice to see my former school mates again. ate even more food.

that day was also my last day of food running training. i did pretty good. im able to hold the plates better and didnt care so much about burning the hell outta hands. i did not look attractive at all since i was all sweaty after the first 20 minutes. whichever the case, i graduated and now its on to server training! whoopi do da.

THURSDAY:
today i woke up at 7:41 AM. i had class at 8 AM. GG MICHELLE!! but since im super woman and i get ready like a dude, i made it to school with time to correct and finish up my hw. yeah, im pretty awesome. i still have to do my video competitions. need time to do those before they end...blah.

first saturday

today was my first saturday off in like three months. i planned today like a week prior and jam packed it with activities. first off i went hiking with sunny, melanie, and gina. i think the second time around was a lot easier for me. melanie and gina had a hard time with the hike but i knew for a fact they felt accomplished afterwards. after the hike we went to ryan's bar and grill for half off pupus. we ordered and ate A LOT of different pupus. it was crazy how much food we had but it was well worth it! then it was movies! sex and the city was the best movie ive seen so far this year!!! it is something everyone should watch even if one has not kept up with the regular series. it makes me believe in love again, much like enchanted. i wish more of my girlfriends come home because after sex and the city, it made me realize how much i miss them. then after the movies i went to mikey's house to "chill." im typing this thing a little buzzed but it was fun. didnt stay that long but drank enough for me to have a good time haha. i gotta go to work early tomorrow for prepping for a grad party. blahhhhhh.

RECAP of the week:

• had my first food running training on wednesday. plates are fricken hott and it wasnt fun.
• locked myself outta my car with my apron, keys, and cellphone before my first day of training, on top of being late. GG me.
• the bar job sucked balls but im not a quitter.
• got an A on my accounting test but idk how long this streak will last.
  

balance

since the start of summer school, i have been trying to balance accounts and what not. when my ledgers and whatever else dont balance, i pretty much wanna cry. this class is like taking up my life since i spent all sunday working on ONE problem. poor darryl had to help me but no success. i woke up early monday morning and i figured out. i even had dreams of balancing my life out and what not. when i start getting dreams of something, it must be major.

i took my first test for accounting and i hope it went well. some parts i got stuck but other than that i did fine. hopefully. after class i went to the gym. i was doing hardcore cardio and as i was cooling down, i saw that a yoga class is gonna start in a few minutes. i went ahead and took the class. before class started, i met the instructor and she said she does "relaxing yoga." HAH, that was one hard yoga class! i was stretching all over the place! in the end, i was really relaxed and once again, i found some balance. as weird as it sounds, accounting has brought peace in my life! at least it made me look at the world in equilibrium. i feel like im doing a good job with it. despite summer school and a heavy work schedule on the weekends, i still make time to see people, though not as many as i hope to see but what i can i say, its a start :)

all i see is you

happy june! i cant believe half the year has passed already. time is flying so fast! i do wanna be 21 like asap but freeze the time right there for a few years! i wanna be able to party like a REAL rockstar haha.

summer school sucks. my first test is tomorrow and i honestly dunno how i will do on it. go me. ill be studying it up all night. also, i got called out on ibeatyou to be lock down from the site for three months. it is a competition that i doubt i will win. so the person that called me out and the ones that i called out can dare me to do something, great lol. it should be good cuz ibeatyou is seriously interfering with school and work cuz im almost always late @_@. speaking of work, im starting my first steps of server training this wednesday! im so nervous because i dont wanna screw up since most of my coworkers know i cant carry heavy things that well but i want to prove them wrong!

i think the love bug has bit me again. well, i should just say lust bug cuz im never gonna find love working so much lol. im infatuated small kine with a surfer boy. why you gotta be such a player. idk what it is that attracts me to him because he's not as attractive as my garden but something about him...idk. whatever happens happens cuz i must keep professional :)

great day

ive came to realize that i dont really have bad days lol. i think i try so damn hard to keep a positive outlook that i cant be brought down that easily. thats a good thing i suppose even tho i get stressed out and tired easily. thank you sercret! there is a lot of things ive given up hope on but it still gets me sometimes.

summer school sucks a cock cuz my teacher is all over the place. so far the class isnt too bad but he doesnt explain well so im not too sure what to study for or whatevers. homework is tedious and the class is just plain too early! eight in the morning is too early to even be awake, yet alone learn. last time i had to wake up this early was for high school...geez. my entire class has FOBs and really soft guys. being a night owl doesnt help my situation either.. i really hate it when people cough a lot because i get paranoid and i am in no mood to get sick. but then again, i might as well get all the ailments and bodily injuries now while i still have insurance *knocks on wood*

im getting tanner since ive been hitting the beach on a regular basis, too bad my back is starting to peel a little. yuck. i hope i can get back to my shade like i was in high school, ultimate darkness (for me at least :D) my online addiction to ibeatyou is starting to turn unhealthy. i should be taking a nap right now but i rather go on that site instead and blog of course. i need to stash my computer away for a while because im too technologically dependent. i even have dreams of ibeatyou! this is getting a little out of hand.

random things on my mind:

• gotta find time to get a hair cut or a trim on my bangs
• go to the gym
• i hate working at the bar
• i got my first beat down on ibeatyou :D :D :D
  
• yeah my mind is pretty blank cant think of anything else
  

crazy

saturday night at xyloh was wilder than i expected it to be. yes i did wanna drink and have fun but i got the whole deal. ill spare the details but i just drank too much too fast since people bought for me. i barely remember what i said that night. definitely something i am not very proud of.

my addiction to ibeatyou is driving me insane. it is seriously my new neopets. i slept until almost noon and i was on that site for two hours and then i went right back to bed until 4 pm. i basically hibernated today. during my nap, i had a dream telling me to get off ibeatyou and go back to neopets because my pet is dying. how insane is that?!?!

ibeatyou

ok so i have a new addiction to cure my boredom. i recently signed on to ibeatyou.com and ive been addicted ever since. its a competition type of site where theres different categories and ppl can upload a video, quote, picture, whatevers and vote for the best. check my profile out :D

http://www.ibeatyou.com/user/purplemochi

let me refer you so i can get more points and vote for me too :P and yes, i think its a healthier addiction than neopets. i should prolly check up on speed_ricer cuz its neglected to the max, poor thing.

today is jeannie's birthday and my coworker jerome from phuket thai. ill update my weekend on this one post because may is getting pretty congested with posts.

UPDATE:
i finally got my grades for KCC. i did a lot better than i thought so im pretty happy. work was crazy but it was fun. thursday there were a lot of drama but whatevers. thursday my coworkers and my boss from phuket got shitfaced and work the next day was painful. i felt so bad for one of them cuz he kept throwing up the whole shift, poor thing. friday was easy. i was lucky to get at least each table to turn twice so i made pretty good money. also i got an $80 tshirt for free! now today is saturday and i am tired. i hope xyloh tonight will be fun :)

full moons to hell hike

monday night had an amazing full moon. me ally and vincent had nothing better to do so we drove out to find it haha. we camera whored for awhile and danny and sharon showed up! it was fun to see ppl again. i totally needed it. ill post our awesome pics soon on facebook.

tuesday i had another mauka to makai excursion. our hike this time was the koko head trail. jeannie warned me that it is HARD and i didnt really wanna believe her that much unless i experience it for myself firsthand. boy she was right. it was a tedious ass hike because its almost a mile of stairs up a giant hill. it took us 20 minutes to climb to the top but that seemed like the longest 20 minutes of my life. it was so painful and tiring to climb up in addition that it was high noon. making it to the top was worth it. the view was amazing. climbing back down was pretty dangerous. i ate it once but it was the most graceful fall ever since it didnt hurt...prolly because my butt was so numb already lol. i felt damn accomplished after that hike.

hit sandy's beach with vincent afterwards and it was alright. didnt stay too long cuz we were hella tired. i hope to have more mauka to makai adventures this summer! maybe ill go try the koko head hike again...for sure not anytime soon tho.

miracle

i survived yet another crazy ass weekend. on thursday night while working at the bar, i developed a killer sore throat. i didnt think too much of it at first cuz its probably from eating the tempura and fried calamari we had left over. i woke up friday with the same sore throat and a headache. i had work at phuket in the morning and i was just lagging. friday night was suppose to be a little get together with everyone at ichiriku but that wasnt a go for me. i was PISSED cuz i was getting really frustrated not being able to see any of my friends for such a long time. went to work at the bar with a major headache, throat still burning on. my coworkers came and it was super cool. made pretty good money despite it was pooled amongst my section. that night i felt like total crap. i had trouble sleeping and i woke up saturday super sick. so sick to the point i could barely move and woke up in a cold sweat. i had to see a doctor cuz if i didnt, i wouldnt have been able to until monday. the doctor prescribed me THREE pills. "those better be some fricken miracle pills if its suppose to cure me in two doses." he offered me a doctor's note to get off work but i declined. prolly the dumbest thing that ever left my mouth.

saturday dinner i had to work the full shift and i was all drugged up. i was sweating all day and all night. it was pretty nasty but i like to think i sweat out the toxins in my body lol. sunday day i didnt do jack shit. i sat around and vegged out pretty much. the only productive thing i did was laundry. i was so hyper for work, it felt great to be so rejuvenated. i seriously need a day off from having to work back to back so often. it was BUSY as hell on a sunday night and it really caught me off guard. i made choke mistakes on the register cuz i kept using someone else's card so i kinda messed up the reports :/ oops.

so yups, thats pretty much my weekend. i prevailed yet another hectic weekend and i was sick too! i totally rock :D this entire week im free from all things work! im excited!!!

PS: i havent seen anyone of my friends in over two weeks. what the hell is up with that?!?! CALL ME UP YOU MOFOS! haha jk. but seriously, i miss you folks :(

sweet talker

...is apparently what i am today. today was my last day of finals and i definitely ended it with a bang. T_T

i woke up bright and early this morning to study a little more for economics. idk how to really study for the final so after awhile i just gave up. i needed like a C to keep my B. WELL...i got a 129 outta 212. thats like a 61%. it dropped my grade to a 78% i leaned over the partition and looked at my teacher with a sad puppy face as she looked through my semester's progress. "well, you did do all your hw and labs..." me: "AND i went to every single class!" and the teacher said it deserves something so she gave me extra credit for a B!!! SO happy.

it was only 9 AM so i decided to head home to take a nap cuz tonight will be a long night. i woke up around 12 and studied for history. as i was driving to school, the time 12:15 started to resonate in my head. i obviously started panicking thinking i may have missed my final. ive been hearing stories of people going late to class, etc so far this week and i was certain i wouldnt be so irresponsible like them. btw, i forgot my essay as well. anyways, got to class and no one was in the classroom. FUCK. so i went to my teacher's office and asked about the final exam. she said i missed it and i cant do anything about it. i had 15 minutes left before the period was over so i made up a stupid excuse and begged cuz i still had time. she let me take it and said i could turn in my essay later. idk how i did on that exam because i was rushing like crazy. i went home and got my essay and drove back to kcc for the THIRD time to drop it off.

sigh....what a day. im so grateful my teachers are pretty cool. i guess that one good thing about kcc cuz grade inflation definitely exists in hawaii. vegas ,the teachers give out less hw but the grade is usually as is. i felt really bad for history cuz i lied and rushed like theres no tomorrow to get it done. oh wells. it still doesnt really feel like summer because i have to work all weekend. my boss from phuket thai called and told me ill be working the full shift on saturday. HOLY CRAP, i havent done that in a while so i hope i have enough energy to make it through.

oh, and KCC's buy back for the books are much better than UNLV's. i got back almost $50 for the history book, amazing.

flattery

ive been dubbed one of the better servers at champions. i am so flattered because ive only worked twice and my hard work has shone through already. but this just means they want me to work more and my social life is lacking. this year ive met a lot of new people who are awesome. but despite all of that, i really miss my friends. im sorry if i seem too busy to do anything. i promise once summer comes around, ill be more available! because i am so damn busy, my love life is definitely gonna be lacking as well. my love life isnt much to begin with and my track record with guys isnt the greatest. he got my mind running in circles. ill just make the most with what i got. i really just wanna have fun while im young but my stupid morals! i just wanna throw it out the window (at least for summer) but deep down idk if i can!!! damn it!

school is ALMOST done. two more finals tomorrow and i am free until 5/27 when i start summer school :( i dread taking my econ final because i dont know what is going on or how to study for it. i refuse to pull all nighters because i think theyre pointless. i believe studying as a threshold and once you hit that "fuck it, i give up" point, no matter how much more you study its just not gonna do you any good. pulling an all nighter writing a paper is different.

things i wanna do this summer:

• BEACH!!!
• drive around island and maybe finally eat kahuku shrimp
• clubbing
• sleeping in
• more beach.

cant wait :D

rest in peace

this morning i decided to finally clean my fishbowl after a few weeks. turns out 2.0 died and he was stiff, nasty. i quickly dumped him in the toilet and flushed it to the great unknown. not much of a ceremony there cuz ive been waiting for a long time for him to end his misery. now its just suicidal snail in the bowl. i need new fish cuz what am i gonna do with just a snail?!

i used to love 2.0 so much. i even gave him a photo shoot but after a month or so, he looked a little decrepit. poor thang. i guess i need a lovechild 3.0.

my brains needs to rest in peace as well. today i studied with some classmates for over 4 hours on math. it was pretty ridiculous. mostly i was playing catch up since this weekend has been crazy so i was really behind on everything. the final wasn't too difficult but a lot of the material caught me by surprise so we'll see in a week or so how i did :/

i wish ppl arent so sketch. like, just make it a point already! get your shit together! you dig??? lol jk, but seriously. many finals left and hello summer school. i love it!

UPDATE: as you can see, ive tried pimping out my iDiary instead of doing hw, yikes. i wish i remembered how to use html cuz back in the day i was pretty darn decent with it. oh wells. listen to that video i have on my left. i guess it sorta matches well with the days i write about and to watch my life go by.

awesomely bad

i really wanna share with you guys my awesomely bad two days. its like so bad that its great after all haha.

UPDATE: one thing i did forget to make my day awesomely bad on thursday: i didnt get my accounting credits so hello summer school!! HELLS TO THE YEAH!!! not.

THURSDAY:

i was unable to sleep a wink that morning. either it was the chai latte i had on wednesday night or i was just too excited/nervous about working at the bar that night. whatever the case i couldnt sleep and i had to wake up early to meet up with my english teacher at kcc. i forgot i didnt have class on thursday so i drove all the way there just for that. so by then i was damn tired and i had to buy clothes for the bar. that took forever and a half. took a casey out for lunch at genkis cuz he's been helping me a lot with math. i drove him back to UH so i could study and i knew i had to pay but casey just said to keep going so i went. by the time i left, i got a fricken parking violation. he is totally paying for it. went home and tried to nap but my dad woke me up the first 30 minutes so i just gave up on the nap. went to the bar and it was awkward. they just gave me the table numbers and told me to just go for it. as the night progressed it got a little easier and it was fun! i made about $100 in the four hours i was there. as i was getting ready to move my car outta the parallel spot, i fucken hit the car behind me. the guy was still in his car but there were no damages. he kept cussing at me so i was just like whatevers and drove off. gg -_-. went to bed around 2 am.

FRIDAY:

woke up early to go to work. went to my car and there was a REAL ticket on my windshield. WTF right?! turns out the police comes into the parking garage to ticket ppl for violations. they fucken ticketed my car on MY property cuz that stall is owned by my dad. definitely gonna fight for that ticket...and plus it was my second ticket in TWO days, geez. went to work kinda anal and it turns out i forgot my name tag and card. kinda slow day at phuket. right after work i went to kcc for a math review. i was stuck in traffic eating my salad. i was only able to stay at the review for like an hour cuz i had to go to the bar. yep, it was pretty much nonstop and the only time i was able to sit was while i was driving -_-. went to the bar cuz it was the grand opening and it was pretty bs how they got things to work. we had too many girls on the floor and they wanted pooled tips. for the longest time i was just standing there lookin pretty. a few of the girls left and it was just me and four other ones from 11-2am. i met rick rock and jake shimabukuro! i was really star struck when i met him, i begged to shake his hand lol. there were other radio personalities and stuff so it was pretty cool. at the end of the night the 5 girls that stayed the whole time only made $70 in NINE hours. all of us easily made over $100 the last two hours but the stupid pooling says otherwise. pretty gay.

now im all tired and its almost 4 am and i gotta study choke tomorrow and work at phuket. this weekend so far has been terrible but there were enough good to make it alright i guess. working 5 shifts in like 3-4 days of finals weekend isnt a good idea...for reals.